We need to talk…

My preferred method of telling a boy I’m not interested in him has traditionally been not telling him. I always thought the best way of turning someone down was to kind of sneak out of sight and let him figure out that I wasn’t into him.  From the 4th grade when I hid in the tube slide to dodge a boy who wanted me to be his girlfriend, up until now when I walk outta my apartment and turn around to walk right back inside to avoid a run in with my overly friendly neighbor, I always dreaded confronting someone with the fact that I didn’t want him back. It’s awful to me. That awkwardness of saying “I don’t really see you that way” or “You’re a great guy, but…” And the look in his eye.  And the awkward walk away. I feel like a tool, and I can’t see him feeling great about things either. As it turns out, the reason I’ve felt like that when I’m ending it with guys is that I am kind of being a tool. Continue reading →

In The Artist, a chance encounter leads to a lifetime love affair. How much do we wish for the same kind of destiny to take hold of us in real life?

Story time! My first real boyfriend and I met in the bleachers at a football game that our home team was losing terribly.  The seats were clearing out quickly, but we were both the stubborn type who believed in staying the whole time to support our team. I noticed his friends because they were all loudly bad mouthing our team, and I was really against them all for it.  It wasn’t long before he turned on the charm and set himself apart from them.  He later said he noticed me in front of him and saw an opportunity to meet me when he noticed my soccer jacket because he played soccer too.  He asked me if I played for the school, and he was in. We hit it off and talked the whole rest of the game.  At the end of that game, our team had lost by probably four touchdowns, but I walked out happy because I had met an awesome guy. Continue reading →

Boy meets girl, boy loses girl, boy fights to get girl back, and then, against all odds, they live happily ever after.  The classic framework for romantic comedies is so simple, yet it tugs at our hearts every time.  Why is it that this particular genre, which has become a mainstay in modern-day storytelling, is so enticing?  When people watch these movies, they believe them.  With no special effects, no tricky camera play, and no elaborate plot line, audiences are swept away and fully invested in the fantasy that romantic comedies’ predictable story lines sell time and time again. Continue reading →

Some say chivalry is dead, some say it is outdated, but as it turns out, it is merely misunderstood.  With so many mixed signals from society about gender roles and responsibilities, reaching for the check at the end of the date has become progressively more awkward.   I set out to see what expectations exist and to objectively determine a standard for today’s dating world.  20 men and women of ages 25-35 weighed in to give their thoughts on who pays for dinner.  The results are overwhelmingly in favor of men paying, and there are many reasons women can feel quite comfortable with letting them. Continue reading →

Every month magazines have new tease lines revealing what men really want, and we turn the pages to find out.  We sit with our girlfriends at lunch and sift through the details of our relationships to find out what the guys in our lives are actually thinking.  Will he stay, will he go, is he into you, is it serious, are we moving forward, did we step back, does he love you, is he seeing someone else?  It’s exhausting, really.  Inevitably it does us no good either.  Even if someone were so inclined to change herself for the wants of the general male population,  it wouldn’t change their attitudes. Continue reading →

She treats him poorly, repels his friends, exhausts his bank account, and plays him like a fiddle. Why, for heaven’s sake, is he still with her?

We all have that special guy in our lives that we think is just the greatest.  He could be the cool guy on campus we watch from afar, the brother or cousin we love to hang out with, the friend we always want to run into, or the coworker we meet and admire everyday.  These are the guys who have it all-personality, style, humor, looks…and awful women.  Watching the men we adore with women who aren’t their equal is tortuous because it is so baffling.  What could he see in this girl?  How could a man with so much depth be so shallow?  What drives him to commit to a woman who makes him miserable most of the time and/or repels his friends?  I’ve set out to find answers to just these questions by interviewing some of my favorite cool guys who are or have been notorious for falling for horrible females. Continue reading →